One cool October day, about fifteen years ago, I asked myself “I wonder if I could channel, like Jane Roberts (Seth) and Joseph Smith (The Book of Mormon) or if you have to be special?” I sat down & I did. Perhaps I’m special, but then again, who isn’t special?
The experience was rather jarring and scared me a little bit, so after three times, I stopped. A few years after that, I was asked to write honestly and not hide behind words. I ended up writing an essay entitled “Why writing is a complete waste of time” and surprised myself with the concluding sentences, “… and that is why writing is so amazing. It can be a personal tool of discovery” or words to that effect. Shortly after that I tried channeling again. For a few years, I channeled nearly every day ending up with a tome of over a million words. But except for sometimes “listening in” while the channel wrote itself (I provided the brain, the body and the fingers), I never read what was written. To this day, I can’t explain what it is or how I do it.
Two years ago, my life fell apart for the umpteenth time, a common occurrence unfortunately. I’m an addict and my addictions to sex and drugs have nearly killed me and left my life in ruins. Just over a year and a half ago, I was homeless, unemployed and destitute. When I got clean again, I decided that everything needed to be different this time. I decided to actually start reading our own words (yes, we think of ourself as “we”) and putting them to the test. Are they of use? Or just more fluff in a too fluffy world?
Right now I’m following the thread “Santa Claus”. Today, I’ll be studying Z0641. Let’s go see what it says.