Z0011 – Anything Goes

C0017 – Anything Goes

I should be going to bed soon. But last night I haven’t even left work yet — jibber jabbering with my boss and god knows what ramifications that will have. Big Thanksgiving party for me tomorrow. Random thits thots going thru my brain. I really don’t understand me or anyone else. Like James Tulsa not coming to the dinner, because he doesn’t want to meet new people, but then does decide to go to the church I sometimes go to … with hundreds of new people to meet. I suppose the bottom line is church, like work, is a professional place where we don’t see what’s really going on. We see what people want to show. I went to church for years with no clue who I was or who others were. I still dont know…

Z0017 – 2007.1125.1225.8430
“The masks we wear” – November 25th, 2007

I found the three missing channels — done in 2004 — and I guess I either deleted some channels or consolidated them, I don’t really care, but here is a channel with the original numbering, now Z0011 but then Z0017. Who cares? No one, including me.

What is a bit peculiar is that on Monday I picked a page at random in Step 5, and a paragraph at random on that page (an assignment from my sponsor) and it was about The Masks We Wear, which is yet another strange coincidence…

I do remember choosing the title “Anything Goes” even though this was written so very long ago. I just wanted to see where it would go without any preordained thoughts. Oh, and btw, I channeled again last night for the first time in a long time. It was a strange and uncomfortable experience.

Larz, 2019.0217


Anything goes, huh? Releasing the opening of the gate is always a conscious process, just like going to sleep is. We crawl in our beds tired and yawing, but until that decision to go to sleep, nothing happens. There are exceptions of course, as you experienced a year ago when you were driving to Denver and fell asleep because it had been so long since you had slept. Sleeping is in part a biochemical process, so when choices have been made to upset that biochemistry, the choice part of falling asleep is more masked.

We all, of course, wear masks. Some masks are by choice, so it seems. Other masks seem to be given to us. We wear them because we are expected to, or because we feel we have no choice, or because we don’t have anything else to wear, or because we don’t know what to wear. Easy of course to look at others and see their masks, their personas and the inconsistent use of both. In fact, we remain hidden even unto ourselves and in some ways to god. God has imbued each of us with a true nature, but the nature of the creative process allows for seeming individuation that prevents the creator from “knowing all there is to know.” To some degree, God’s creations surprise even himself as he expands outward into his own creations.

Anything goes is not really ever the case then, because some masks are quite specific, and it is the rarer mask that works in all occasions.

Yes, you have correctly surmised the handle to which the unconscious has triggered[1] and now you are seeing the expansion process in your own mind. But that is not to be shared at the moment. Not because it shouldn’t be, but because it is off the point.

We all want to be part of All That Is and fearing we are not will change our external appearance so that we might be more easily accepted. We are not only limited to the words known within this construct, but even at a deeper, symbolic transformation level, we choose to use these words. Just as one would not purposefully hurt a sensitive creature by exposing them to a harsh toxin, would one also neither expose such a creature to toxic symbols. The symbol of a devil, for instance, may appear comical to some, or mythological to others, or perhaps strike such fear in the heart that they would be shocked into a seeming death. So, a true spirit would not appear as a pointy eared, red toned devil, unless it was understood in the construct matrix that that mask was an appropriate one. That is to say, as an actor we choose not only our role, but also the costume we wear.

All of us, from you to we, carry about ourselves a see of firefly-like appearances ready to rearrange and mask us at any time.

Matter, for instance is a “mask” of reflections … the properties of matter are more dependent upon the observer than anything. For instance, dense matter may appear insignificant to a being composed of neutrinos for instance. Or let’s say one is composed of glass and we are interacting with a crowd of strongly phased and frequencified lasers. An ultraviolet laser or an infrared laser may look through the glass darkly and interact strongly, whereas a green laser might shine through, not noticing the molecular construction. In this case, as an example, the nature of the observer, the violet, the red, or the green, will determine the interaction with the mask. A mask has no existence independent of the interactions it has.

That is hard to explain. But a mask is more than the wearier of the mask, the role or persona they play. The persona requires a … a subsona … the subject receiver of the sound.

[1] I just reread this and what can I say, but interesting and fun. At one point what was being referred to was I plopped in front of the TV a few minutes ago, after work, and finished watching the Cher “final concert” tour, which I so enjoy. The sound, the dancing, and I did want to re-see the videos from her life. There was a movie clip about her being the mother of a freakish boy with some facial abnormality. I haven’t seen the movie, but I think it was called The Mask. As soon as I realized this, while channeling, I immediately saw a Jim Carrie movie DVD box that was entitled The Mask, and I saw a funny Jack Russell Terrier that was in the movie wearing a funny mask. What is especially fun for me is that only a few years ago, as a relatively old man, did I ever visualize. And still it rarely happens.

I’ve never considered this before: that a mask requires both the person behind the mask, the actor, but also the person in front of it, the intended audience or more commonly, the observer. And that it is the truth, isn’t it. We were masks for the perceived benefit of the audience, but also the perceived benefit of ourself.

I need to get cracking on the postings. This particular channel didn’t wow me or enlighten me … but here it is.

I looked down a little further and there was a followup blurb … that is why the channel ended so abruptly. Here it is … and for the heck of it, a doodle…

I’m itching bad from sleepy crying … this is Larz. So I interrupted the flow…

I have realized that I am wake or asleep, conscious or dreaming. Usually I am conscious awake or asleep dreaming. But sometimes I am conscious asleep (when I “wake up” inside a dream) or othertimes I am dreaming awake, which is a daydream, or now, a channeling process.

Channeling for me today is akin to the doodles I draw, but haven’t in some time. I don’t know what the outcome will be when I start. But as I get into the circle-after-circle doodling process, I can feel parts of my brain switching its attention and some form of calculations start taking place. Symmetries of color and geometric connection start forming, and then I feel an even deeper message forming; the story of the doodle starts surfacing. I find the process fun and surprising. Although I am the doodler and the stories come from me, I don’t understand them until long afterwards in most cases. And even then I am not sure if the story was initially there, or if I invited the story later to fit the existing facts of the arrangement of the colored circles. I am aware of the choice levels. For each circle there is only one of two choices (following the first two critical circles drawn. circle 3 is the critical choice); to draw a square arrangement, a 2×2 grid, or to draw a circular arrangement, a 1 center, 6 outside, grid. The symmetry is essentially therefore based on either the number 3 or the number 4. My point? The channel is no different. The rules are perhaps more complex. Each symbol can only be followed by so many other symbols, and combined in certain rules. Ta, Tb, Tc … Sa, Sb, Sc … Goes to The, Then, Them … etcetera. In other words, I have my own general rules for English word and sentence and paragraph construction. My thoughts follow their own patterns. So although the words come from me, in some deep way they just flow from their own source, and later I can see the story within or behind them, in the same way I can say later “This is what this doodle is about.” But while it is happening that does not seem to be the case.

Of course, I suppose that if a grammatical, syntaxical, word usage, punctuation frequency, and other statistical analyses of “channeled” vs “regular” work were to be done, they would not reveal any significant differences. To that end, I doubt the origin or source of the material could ever be ascribed to anyone but me. To that end, yet again, I feel the channeling process is just some sort of “flow of consciousness” and that I call it “The Voice” or the words “We” or “Spirits from Beyond” or whatever are just euphemisms for myself, either based in ego, or self-deception or some other “non cosmic” source. Then again, perhaps they are of value to others other than myself. I don’t know. No one has ever read them. So, as always for me, I am writing for the man beyond myself. The self behind myself.

Perhaps someday, perhaps someday soon, I’ll awake in my dreams and find myself in a new life never to return. I have been in a few places over the dream years I like just as much as earth. Who really knows what lies beyond the great beyond. Who really knows where consciousness is or comes from. So who knows, perhaps there is more than meets the… Maybe The Voice was right. “Anything Goes” really isn’t the case at all. We’re too busy living behind our masks…

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